Sideways Sun
Sarcasms, stories and poems of a mildly pleasant persuasion
The Burgundy Bookmark
Novel. Juvenile fiction (8-12)
260 pages
When the four Mackaman children visit their eccentric uncle’s dark and mysterious library, they are only hoping to escape Summer Boredom. Instead, they discover a burgundy bookmark inside an ancient blank journal that takes them into the world of books in a way they never imagined. Pirates, with bad teeth and bad grammar. Wish-making creatures in the sand. Angry villagers with torches and story problems. As it turns out, reading a book and surviving one are two very different things...
Hardcover
Softcover
Welcome to Sweet Angus
Short story humor series
Each book approx 240 pages
Welcome to Sweet Angus. A fictional Midwestern town (though lord, haven't we all been there!) where small things like pea salad, inappropriate mourning, cussing Santas, and murderous pigeons (in the bird's defense, it was probably accidental) can turn the town upside down. Each book contains 4 head-shaking and needless stories. I am sorry I wrote them, but these characters persisted and I did not want to endure them on my own any longer. You are welcome. Book 1 is about done; all others are in progress. Which, ya know....
Children's poetry
Goldilocks has Purple Hair
And other unfortunate poems for the Young and Mildly Salvageable
Volume 1. 60 pages
More slightly offbeat (heh heh) poems aimed for the wee through elementary. Or childish adults. We don't judge. Hand-drawn illustrations. In this group: talkative false teeth, an un-gold Goldilocks, ghosts on a swingset, and a lovely midwinter dance in the snow. Because gentle sarcasm sometimes works best when mixed with joy.
Side note: Many of these I have turned into songs, which you can find in the pitchydog Sounds section of this site.
Hardcover
Softcover
Excuse Me While I Kick You
And other unfortunate poems
for the Young and Ruinable
Volume 2. 60 pages
I handwrote these poems for my daughters from ages wee to not so wee, trying to instill a sense of, well, sarcasm, a moderately kind heart and a different way of viewing life. We all contributed to the artwork. This book culls such essentials as clumsy ants, Snocks under the bed, a crow party, banana slippers and polite bullies. Because gentle sarcasm, even with an odd kick, should still be kind.
Side note: Many of these I have turned into songs, which you can find in the pitchydog Sounds section of this site.
Hardcover
Softcover
The Bones of Mr. Jones
2nd and up; poem story book.
48 pp
Yeah, so the bones of this kindly old man keep droppin' out of his skin. Fortunately he got a dog to retrieve them for him and he puts them back in place. But alas, strange things start happening anyway... See how Mr. Jones, his wife, and his trusty (?) companion get to the bottom of this bone debacle.
Hardcover
Softcover
My Teacher Tried to Kill Me with a Dinosaur
2nd and up; poem story book.
36 pp.
Trouble starts with T. And so does T-rex. (So does Teacher, for that matter, but I digress.) And Trouble is what happens when a dinosaur shows up in Milo's homework.
Hardcover
Softcover
I Wish that Everything was Blue
Hardcover
Softcover
Rhyming story book
44 pages
For wee ones as a read-aloud or read it to them, a simple picture-book-style romp through colors and imagination, and what might happen if you have too much of a good thing.